One of Besharam’s earliest customers contacted us three times before placing an order. The concern was not about the product itself, but about the packaging.
“Will anyone know what’s inside?”
For those operating in adult retail — especially across diverse markets — the challenge is this: Stop viewing shame as purely cultural.
That question stayed with me because it reflected something much larger than sex: vulnerability.
When people think about the sex toy business in India, they often imagine a founder battling taboos, restrictive laws and sensational headlines. In my experience, however, the reality has been much quieter and far more practical.
The biggest obstacle was never sex itself. It was shame, specifically how shame influences consumer behavior, operational decisions and trust.
I learned early on that adult retail is not just about selling products; it is about creating emotional safety. A retailer can offer a strong product assortment, competitive pricing and fast shipping, but if customers feel exposed, judged or misunderstood, the sale is lost. That reality exists in every market, including the U.S. and Europe. The difference lies in how those concerns manifest and how retailers address them at scale.
Ultimately, building a pleasure products business across multiple markets has taught me this: adult retail must become more transparent, compassionate and practical in serving customers who seek pleasure, privacy and dignity all at once.
Privacy, Not Morality
In India, conversations about sex are often kept private within families, even when people speak openly with friends. Many consumers navigate dual mindsets: they may feel comfortable with peers, yet remain reserved around parents, roommates or elders. That dynamic directly influences purchasing behavior.
Though not necessarily ashamed, customers more often simply do not want to explain themselves.
Over time, I realized that what retailers often interpret as shame is, in fact, a need for privacy. Customers are not always concerned with whether pleasure is acceptable; more often, they are concerned with controlling who knows about it.
That reality played out in practical ways across operations. Customers preferred cash payments to avoid transaction records. Some requested abbreviated names on packages, while others opted out of follow-up emails altogether. If the packaging looked obvious, the product name seemed too explicit, or the delivery process felt risky, they abandoned the purchase entirely.
Once you understand that, the retail strategy changes. The focus shifts from promoting boldness to building systems that allow customers to explore with comfort and privacy.
Learning Through Customer Behavior
In the early days, many shoppers did not even know what to ask for. Some browsed products for days, added items to their carts and then disappeared. Others reached out cautiously, almost apologetically, asking whether their interests were “normal.”
Those years involved constant trial and error.We imported products that had performed well internationally and tested them with Indian consumers. Some succeeded, but many did not, often for reasons Western brands do not always take into account. Storage privacy mattered. Noise levels mattered. Discreet charging mattered. Clear instructions and ease of use for first-time buyers mattered.
Over time, customer feedback became one of our most valuable retail tools, shaping product selection, merchandising, pricing and communication strategies.
The market gradually evolved from curiosity-driven purchases to more informed repeat customers who knew what they wanted and were willing to invest in quality.
That shift matters because growth in adult retail is not only about expanding reach; it is also about building confidence. As confidence grows, customer behavior changes. Shoppers return with more clarity, more curiosity and less concern about judgment. That is when sexual wellness moves from taboo to an established retail category.
A Large Market With Specific Buying Patterns
India’s population may exceed 1.4 billion, but the realistic addressable market for pleasure products is much smaller. Consumers still need internet access, disposable income, privacy and a willingness to experiment. In practical terms, the reachable audience is closer to 200–250 million people.
Even within that segment, market penetration remains relatively low. That signals strong long-term growth potential, but only if retailers understand what continues to slow adoption.
One of the more surprising insights has been the performance of Tier 2 and Tier 3 cities, which often generate higher average order values than major metropolitan areas. There is a common assumption that demand is concentrated in large urban markets. In reality, consumers outside major cities often have fewer in-store shopping options and a stronger preference for discreet online purchases. Once trust is established, basket sizes tend to increase.
India’s sexual wellness sector is currently in a phase similar to the early growth stages of ecommerce: rapid expansion, steep consumer learning curves and significant untapped demand.
But growth phases also introduce risk. When brands prioritize short-term sales over customer trust, they undermine long-term category development. That is where operational maturity becomes critical.
Operations Shape the Customer Experience
In adult retail, operations are not simply backend logistics; they directly shape the customer experience. Discreet packaging is not just a feature — it is a promise. Product naming is not just branding — it is risk management. Delivery execution, invoice language, customer support tone, return policies and payment reliability all influence whether a customer feels safe making a purchase.
In India, these operational challenges are compounded by inconsistent legal and regulatory frameworks. Sex toys are not always clearly defined within modern law, obscenity regulations are often outdated and enforcement can vary significantly. Customs clearance can also be unpredictable, with similar products receiving very different outcomes.
That uncertainty affects retail operations in very real ways. Businesses must manage inventory cautiously, diversify sourcing and build flexibility into their supply chains. Manufacturing limitations around technology and infrastructure also continue to shape the market, which is one reason global production remains heavily concentrated in China.
Western brands sometimes underestimate these realities. In their home markets, discretion and pricing may be secondary concerns. In India, they are central to the customer experience. Retail strategies cannot simply be copied from the U.S. or Europe — they must be localized around trust.
Reducing Friction in Adult Retail
Several principles have consistently proved effective and remain relevant for adult retailers globally.
First, position pleasure products as enhancements rather than replacements. Customers respond more positively when products are framed as tools that support intimacy instead of substitutes for it.
Second, prioritize calm, beginner-friendly education. Customers do not need lectures or overwhelming technical explanations; they need clarity around product selection, expectations, safety and care.
Third, ensure that privacy extends beyond packaging. It should inform product design, charging methods, sound levels, labeling and customer service interactions. Every touchpoint contributes to the customer’s comfort level.
Fourth, let customer feedback actively shape retail strategy. In higher-stigma categories, feedback is often indirect, surfacing through returns, reviews and purchasing patterns rather than direct complaints. Retailers that pay attention to those signals make smarter merchandising and pricing decisions.
Finally, transparency matters, but it must be practical. Customers want clear communication about materials, safety standards, warranties and realistic expectations. In more complex regulatory environments, transparency becomes one of the strongest ways to build long-term trust.
Designing for Compassion
The future of sexual wellness is not about louder marketing or increasingly provocative messaging. It is about designing retail systems that normalize pleasure while respecting the realities customers navigate every day.
For adult retailers operating across different markets, the challenge is to stop viewing shame solely as a cultural issue and start treating it as a design problem that can be solved operationally.
When friction is reduced and trust is built consistently, retailers do more than grow a category. They create space for customers to explore pleasure with greater confidence, privacy and dignity.
Raj Armani is the COO and co-founder of online retailer IMbesharam.
