Erectile dysfunction is one of the most frustrating issues that people with penises experience in the bedroom. Although it is common, affecting roughly 30 million cisgender men in the U.S. alone, it is still stigmatized and considered taboo. Without information and support, experiencing ED can make a person feel like it means the end of sex as they know it. In adult retail and sex education spaces, however, we know that is not true.
Generally, store staff are trained to help shoppers with ED consider options beyond penetrative sex and let go of the myth that sexual satisfaction requires an erection. But what if there’s something missing from those conversations? How do we support people coping with erectile dysfunction who genuinely miss penetration?
Generally, store staff are trained to help shoppers with ED consider options beyond penetrative sex.
Today we’re going to talk about intimacy with erectile dysfunction and look at ways you can help your shoppers find a satisfying sexual experience, including intercourse, without an erection.
Sex Shopping With ED
When someone experiencing erectile dysfunction enters your store, their goals and curiosities are likely to vary somewhat from other shoppers. Some may be seeking affirmation or reassurance that their sex life is not over. Others may be seeking products that can provide penis pleasure without requiring an erection. Yet others may be there specifically to explore products that simulate having an erection.
You also may encounter shoppers who are still working through the unfair stigma that this kind of diagnosis can carry, and who aren’t sure if there are products out there for them. Make sure your staff is prepared to work with and support every one of those shoppers.
Intimacy Without an Erection
Fortunately, there are pleasure products built for flaccid penises, like stroker attachments that can be combined with wand massagers. These can be used — and are known to bring about orgasm — without an erection.
Folks looking to discover something entirely new might also enjoy products made for pleasuring the prostate, which does not require an erection. Shoppers with partners could benefit from being reminded that intimate massage is a fantastic way to connect with each other, and that massage kits can make it an easy, fun and sexily messy full-body experience with or without an erection.
Making Penetration Possible
Our culture tends to focus, to an unhelpful degree, on insertive intercourse as the focus of sex. For someone experiencing any kind of erectile difficulty, this can add an extra level of pressure to an already stressful situation. Recently, sex education and adult retail have seen an exciting and much-needed movement toward teaching folks about the many options beyond penis-focused intercourse, and it's important to remind people that there is so much more to sex than erections. However, it's also important to acknowledge that, for any number of reasons, some customers really value that part of their sexual experience. For them, we have a whole other set of options.
Some folks dealing with erectile dysfunction find that they can create and maintain an erection temporarily through the use of a penis pump, especially when used in conjunction with a cock ring. Some penis extenders have a cock ring at the base, making them easy to wear even if the ring’s enhancing support starts to wane. These items are great for people who want to add some girth and length to their erections, too. Penis enhancers and extenders give users options that feel like extensions of their body, which can make them feel more comfortable.
What if the customer in question is prone to losing their erection during sex and wants reliable support? They might be interested in something like a hollow strap-on, which can be worn over a completely flaccid penis. There are many hollow strap-on options available, including ones that add vibration to the equation.
The Help Your Shoppers Need
The most important thing you can do for shoppers who are navigating intimacy while coping with erectile dysfunction is to make your establishment a safe space free of judgment and filled with options. Make sure your staff is educated about the various ways that this condition can present, how common it is and even the social stigma that’s attached, so they can be prepared to have nuanced conversations.
By helping shoppers feel like they are not alone and like their condition is not insurmountable, you can help them feel comfortable talking about exactly what it is they need and want. In turn, listening to their responses will help you zero in on which products to recommend and what additional information or options they might benefit from, including complementary products.
Helping customers with ED find their way to satisfying intimate experiences that don’t center on erections also has the added benefit of helping these shoppers reclaim some of the confidence and relationship satisfaction that may have waned following their diagnosis. Not only is that beneficial to them personally, but it’s also a fantastic way to create a loyal, trusting customer.
Rebecca Weinberg is an award-winning industry executive with more than 20 years of experience in the adult industry. She is the president of multi-award-winning pleasure product manufacturer XR Brands.
