When focusing on men’s sexual health, one crucial topic to discuss is how stress can impact men’s sexual well-being, and what can be done about it.
Stress can influence blood flow, circulation and the sympathetic nervous system, all of which are vital for maintaining sexual function. Additionally, it can contribute to health problems like cardiovascular issues, obesity and diabetes — which are also connected to sexual dysfunction.
Having staff educated on both products and sexual well-being is something that big-box stores will never be able to offer.
Let’s briefly examine the biological mechanics of stress, then dive into how sexual wellness products can help.
Cortisol and Performance Anxiety
When stress takes hold, the stress hormone cortisol essentially acts as the body’s alarm system, boosting alertness and preparing the body for fight-or-flight. The downside is that this can also impact sexual function by disrupting testosterone production.
When stress causes a biological shutdown, feelings of failure and shame can arise, creating a vicious cycle of performance anxiety. In other words, once it happens, it will almost certainly happen again.
Fortunately, we in the sexual wellness industry are uniquely equipped to help change that narrative. Let’s look at the various options, and the best ways to present and explain them to customers.
Products That Support Performance
Penis pumps can be a helpful option for managing performance anxiety. They promote intentional, non-intercourse blood flow and sensory awareness. This can help reduce the pressure and unpredictability of performance stress. I always advise customers to think of the penis as just another muscle, and a penis pump as a simple piece of exercise equipment. It’s there to give users a workout that will boost blood flow to the penis and help address performance anxiety, which in turn can enhance mental health and overall well-being.
Couples toys can also help reduce performance anxiety, since stress often comes from the fear of disappointing a partner. These toys enable shared experiences, shifting focus away from one partner’s performance. This can help build trust between partners and allow that unpleasant hormone cortisol to “stand down,” letting the pleasure systems activate again.
Perineal massage is also great for stress relief, in addition to stimulating the male G-spot and boosting blood flow to the prostate gland. While it can be done with just a finger, or a gentle external massage using your hand, there are many vibrating and nonvibrating products available that are effective for perineal massage as well.
Educating About the Negative Effects of Stress
Talking with customers about stress and performance issues is a perfect example of why it is so important to invest in training employees to become sexual wellness consultants. They should be experts not only on the products they sell but also on the safety of those products and healthy intimacy practices. Having staff educated on both products and sexual well-being is something that big-box stores will never be able to offer.
Staff should use plain language when explaining the connection between stress and sexual dysfunction:
● Explain the cortisol-function link. “When you’re under stress, your body releases a hormone called cortisol. It’s the ‘fight or flight’ alarm. That alarm system is useful during an emergency, but when it’s constantly active, it can disrupt testosterone levels and hinder blood flow needed for sexual function.” Make it clear to shoppers that we’re not selling a cure; we’re offering tools that help the body turn that alarm off, so their pleasure systems can naturally come back online.
● Address the vicious cycle. Validate the customer’s experience to build trust. “It often becomes a vicious cycle: stress causes an issue, the issue causes shame or performance anxiety, and that shame guarantees the problem will happen again because you’ve added more stress.” Let them know that the goal of products like pumps or couples toys is to break the cycle by fostering a positive experience that is completely separate from the pressure of intercourse. It’s about valuing presence over performance.
● Emphasize wellness over “toy.” Consistently refer to the products using language that emphasizes health and self-care. Use phrases like “wellness tools” or “self-care aids.” Frame the purchase as an investment in well-being. For instance, “This wellness tool can be used in helping to reduce tension that can benefit overall health.”
Tips for Merchandising, Display and Outreach
Here are a few ways you can incorporate solutions for stress and performance issues into your wellness-focused retail space:
● Design a dedicated “Men’s Health” section. Use clear, health-oriented signage. Labels like “Stress & Tension Relief,” “Pelvic Floor Wellness” and “Performance & Pleasure” can guide customers to products while emphasizing sexual wellness and self-care.
● Create male wellness kits. Bundle products that help manage stress. A kit could include a perineal massager with a guide to its benefits, and a water-based lubricant. Or include a pump, a C-ring and a lubricant that works well with pumps, along with a guide on how to use pumps.
● Partner with experts. Collaborate with local sexual health educators, urologists or wellness coaches to host free workshops or seminars. Topics might include “Stress and Your Body,” “Relax and Reconnect” or “Pelvic Floor Health for Men.” These kinds of events can help establish your store as a trusted health resource, not just a place to buy products.
Helping men alleviate stress, so they can focus on presence instead of performance, is a great way to support your male shoppers. It promotes men’s health, improves their sexual and overall well-being — and wins you loyal customers.
Staci Cruse is the brand ambassador lead and education coordinator for Blush.
