I’m often asked, “What is a silk domme?” I don’t have the perfect elevator speech answer for this yet; it means so many different things to me. It’s about the particular collection of fetish activities I enjoy, like feminization and silk scarf bondage, which have an obvious common thread of feminine sensuality. But it’s also an aesthetic. I love silk: the sensual indulgence of it, all the powerful symbolism of it, the sheer versatility of it and my love of silk imbues everything I do as a professional dominatrix and fetish porn creator.
My silk fetish was one of the main things that put me on the path to being where I am today (you can find out more on how that came about by visiting my blog at EvilOpal.com). Now that I’m here, it infuses every aspect of my creative product. As a sensual domina, I use silk very often in my play activities. It has a texture unlike anything else, which makes it absolutely fantastic for use in sensation play.
Visually, my ‘silk domme’ style is very influenced by pin-up, burlesque and golden age Hollywood glamour.
I particularly love having a soft silk scarf nearby when I’m doing any kind of corporal punishment scene. I’ll lay down some blows with my flogger or paddle or whatever, then stroke my submissive’s skin with the scarf as I murmur sweet words of humiliation and threats of what’s to come in their ear. Alternating a soothing sensation with the painful one gives time for endorphins to build and thus helps the bottom to tolerate heavier levels of pain. Plus, it just looks sexy, both of which make for a better video!
Silk scarves can also be used as blindfolds. Being blindfolded psychologically gives a little thrill of vulnerability and even fear, which really pushes the arousal buttons of most submissives. Not being able to see forces them to use their other senses and to focus their attention more completely on their dominant. It helps take them out of normal headspace and opens a door for them to enter that altered state known as subspace. And a folded scarf tied around the head gives that classic “damsel in distress” look — which I, for one, especially enjoy seeing on a big strong man!
A folded scarf is also a classic look for a gag. I love to amp this one up even further by combining a scarf with another item of clothing, such as my worn stockings or panties. Making my slave smell and taste these items adds even more layers of sensory involvement to the scene. I like to make a point of rubbing it in verbally that he’s doing these things, both to enhance his feelings of humiliation/arousal and to bring the viewer of the end-result video more fully into the sensory experience.
Of all the many ways silk can be incorporated into kinky play (and kinky porn) silk bondage is an entire fetish in its own right. Many bondage enthusiasts swear by the virtues of silk rope. Personally I’m a fan of silk scarf and sari bondage. I love the colorfulness of it, the “gift-wrapped” look, the luxurious sensuality. I also very much love the practicality: silk scarves are a lot cheaper to buy and maintain than most BDSM gear. And when it comes to travel, I know my scarves will never make my luggage overweight or cause any awkward moments with airport security. I have to say a word here also for the utility of men’s silk neckties for all these things. There’s something deeply sexy about seeing a businessman tied up with his own tie.
It’s true that silk scarf bondage lacks the harsh, brutal look you can get with macho leather, rubber, etc. But that’s part of the charm of it: it’s softer, more feminine, opulent and colorful. And I’ve learned a few tricks over the years for how to create surprisingly effective restraints with silk. I can make arm and leg binders and even do full-body mummifications.
Visually, my “silk domme” style is very influenced by pin-up, burlesque and golden age Hollywood glamour. I prefer playing and filming in settings that look more like palaces than dungeons. And I wear a lot more silky lingerie than stereotypical dominatrix leather or latex. Which brings me to the other area of fetish play where silk is such a powerful force, what I like to call dress-up play.
You see, silk is never a fabric used for humdrum everyday clothing. It’s not what your yard-work clothes or your sick day sweats are made of. Silk is for ball gowns and CEO suits, and the finest, most delicately feminine lingerie. It has a very, very long history of being associated with wealth and power; for the first 1,000 years it was used by humans, it was a prized treasure — and closely guarded secret — of Chinese Emperors. The right costume can contribute so much to both a kinky play scene and a fetish porn video, and silk’s powerful symbolic associations work to enhance either.
Thanks to those symbolic associations, silk adds an aura of elegance and power when worn by a domina. This is true even if it’s just a silk dressing gown or a silk top with leggings. And when worn by a male submissive, even a simple pair of silk panties is incredibly emasculating — a dream come true for 99 percent of sub guys!
Silk looks gorgeous. It feels amazing. It’s super versatile and equally practical. And it carries powerful symbolic associations that can be called on to great effect in my work as a professional dominatrix and fetish porn creator. That’s why I chose to highlight my fetish for silk in my branding as “Evil Opal — The Silk Domme.”
Evil Opal is a silk domme and fetish producer who can be followed on Twitter @EvilOpal and EvilOpal.com.
