educational

Nine Reasons You’re Having Trouble Getting Good Press

I’ve covered the adult industry as a journalist for more than 10 years, been backstage at award shows and front row at obscenity trials, and nothing I’ve seen shocks me more than the way the porn industry deals press. (And vice versa.)

A few years ago, I got a frantic call from an old friend — a producer in the midst of a crisis. A national news outlet was on the phone, asking about a problem he was having with a disgruntled former model. What should he say? I listened to his side, and told him what to do. The story was killed without so much as a whimper. In the years, as both a journalist and a press liaison, I’ve learned a lot about how the adult industry shoots itself in the foot when dealing with press, and how it misses out on incredible opportunities.

We’re hustlers for exposure, and that leaves us vulnerable. A mention on TMZ, or Perez Hilton, or the Daily Mail can drive hundreds of thousands of potential members to your site, buy your toy or follow you on Twitter.

The adult industry contains multitudes, from dating sites and distributors to performers and pleasure products. At some point, I’ve worked or covered all of them. Below are the nine piece of advice that I tell anyone who’s interested in improving their relationship with the press.

1. Stop Treating Press Like Your Friend

We’re hustlers for exposure, and that leaves us vulnerable. A mention on TMZ, or Perez Hilton, or the Daily Mail can drive hundreds of thousands of potential members to your site, buy your toy or follow you on Twitter. A good story gets repeated on hundreds of blogs and thousands of social media accounts. If done right, good press can make you as much in a month as you make the rest of the year. Still, every time I answer a press call, or click send on an email, I’m know I’m staring at the Sword of Damocles.

After all, good press is independent. They’re focused on telling an accurate and interesting story. But others may have a negative agenda. Like you, journalists depend on traffic. And a juicy accusation, a scandalous side note, or bad behavior often drives more than a positive business profile. I’ve seen a journalist abandon a glowing profile because a director made an insensitive comment — that became the story. I’ve seen reporters who gain access with a positive piece, only to bash a performer in print. I’ve seen press releases mocked, and Change.org petitions filed. When you open that door, everything is fair game.

2. Stop Treating Press Like An Enemy

While there are some raised daggers out there, for the most part, journalists aren’t out to get you. Sure, there’s a default cultural bias against adult industry (producers are gloried pimps, performers are too dumb to know better). But most journalists are smarter than that, and aren’t interested in some hackneyed story that’s already been written a thousand times. When they call you, they’re looking for an interesting, fresh and sexy piece. Other times, they’ve heard an rumor — and they’re calling to get your side.

Either way, answer that call. Keeping your guard up shouldn’t mean sticking your head in the sand. A bad story won’t go away because you don’t respond. Help them get the right story by working with them in a respectful way that helps them get what they need.

3. No One Wants Your Press Release

Most press releases are as interesting as a family holiday letter. Exclamation points and humble-brags, news that’s interesting to the company but not the reader. As a journalist, I get hundreds of press releases a week. Most I just delete. As a press agent, I rarely send out a release — but when I do, I make sure it’s low on braggadocio and heavy on possible stories. It’s short, it’s clear, and probably has a few angles teased out. Journalists are hungry for stories, and allergic to publicity. Learn the difference.

4. ‘Worksafe’ Means Something Different Than You Think It Does

Not everyone writing about adult industry is able to surf fisting videos at work. If you’re looking to promote a new vibrator, or gangbang, or hook-up app, make sure you’ve minimize what they have to dig through to get to the story — and alert them if you’re sending them a link they might not want to open in public (or in front of their toddler). If I can’t visit a site, I can’t write a story.

5. No One Can Reach You

For an industry that loves press, we bury our contact information. I often get calls from journalists looking to get in touch with a certain producer or performer. I might Google the home number for your 2257 records-keeper to find you, but most journalists won’t. Build a press site with information and a direct email or phone number.

6. No One Can Reach You In Time

An average blogger might turn around 5-10 stories a day. A beat journalist at a daily might have twelve hours. Have someone in your office who can reply promptly, or at least ask when their deadline to file is. You don’t have to participate in every story, but you should at least have the option.

8. Know Before You Blow

Want to avoid bad press? Know when it’s coming. When you get a press request, Google them like you would a first date and comb through their previous work like a scene partner’s testing history. Look at their social media. What’s their approach to sex? How to they view sex work? Do they treat interviewees respectfully? Are they balanced? Do you really want to get in bed with a journalist that isn’t?

9. You’re Pitching To The Wrong Person

I spend a good hour each morning running through recently published stories on sex, dating, porn, censorship and other spaces. I make notes as to who covers what and where, and who’s doing good work. I keep my ear to the ground for industry stories I’d want to write (and if I don’t have time, I pass them along to journalists who can). It’s like running a dating service.

You might not have the time to comb through it all, but if you don’t know who is writing about your business for places like Maxim, Huffington Post or Cosmo, how can you expect to pitch the right person?

Mike Stabile is a journalist and filmmaker who has written about the adult industry for publications including Playboy, Buzzfeed, the Daily Beast and The New York Times. He has worked as a press liaison for Kink.com, NakedSword, Glyde, Eros.com and the Free Speech Coalition, among others. He can be reached through his website, PolariMedia.com or followed on Twitter @mikestabile.

Related:  

Copyright © 2025 Adnet Media. All Rights Reserved. XBIZ is a trademark of Adnet Media.
Reproduction in whole or in part in any form or medium without express written permission is prohibited.

More Articles

opinion

The 'Wall of Shame' in Adult Retail: Deterrent or Dilemma?

Retail theft affects all kinds of businesses, but adult retailers face unique challenges when it comes to loss prevention. One of the more controversial strategies some retailers have adopted is the “wall of shame,” a public display of shoplifters caught in the act.

Rin Musick ·
profile

Segpay Marks 20 Years of High-Risk Triumphs

Payment processors are behind-the-scenes players in the world of ecommerce, yet their role is critical. Ensuring secure, seamless transactions while navigating a rapidly changing regulatory landscape requires both technological expertise and business acumen.

Jackie Backman ·
opinion

The SCREEN Test: How to Prepare for Federal Age Verification

For those who are counting, there are now 20 enacted state laws in the United States requiring age verification for viewing online adult content, plus numerous proposed laws in the works. This ongoing barrage has been exhausting for many in the adult industry — and it may be about to escalate in the form of a potential new AV law, this time at the federal level.

Corey D. Silverstein ·
opinion

Mitigating Retail Shrink Through Intelligent Video Solutions

Retail shrink isn’t just a cost of doing business — it’s an existential threat. Theft, fraud, operational inefficiencies and employee mismanagement chip away at profits in ways that many business owners don’t even realize.

Sean Quinn ·
opinion

How to Master Team Dynamics for Business Success

Having the right team in place is everything. Whether getting a startup off the ground and thriving, or safeguarding an established company, the right — or wrong — people can mean the difference between a successful venture and a failed dream.

Juicy Jay ·
opinion

The Power of Authenticity in Selling Pleasure Products

I’ve been working in the pleasure industry for more than two decades. For a significant chunk of that time, I thought that to be successful in sales, I had to fit a mold. I assumed that selling meant following a formula: say the right things, use the right voice and present myself in a way that was guaranteed to convert.

Kimberly Scott Faubel ·
opinion

Eight Steps to Fast-Track AI Site Approval for Processing

Artificial intelligence is a hot topic these days. AI technology is speeding up the way we do business across all industries and offers numerous benefits, from automating processes to increasing efficiency and scalability.

Cathy Beardsley ·
profile

Dennis DeSantis on Building a Blockbuster Career in Adult Retail

The adult industry and the mainstream Hollywood scene often intersect, and few executives are more familiar with that crossover than Dennis DeSantis.

Ariana Rodriguez ·
opinion

How to Secure High-Risk Transactions With Network Tokenization

Ensuring the security of data as it moves through digital channels is the foundation of safe transactions, and crucial for your success. If your business can’t secure transactions, you’re exposed to myriad processing traumas.

Jonathan Corona ·
profile

'Pleasure Professionals Place' Facebook Group Marks 5 Years of Fostering Connections

Where can you find the pleasure industry’s most tantalizing, trending and relevant conversational banter? For once, we’re not talking about a trade show after-party!

Colleen Godin ·
Show More