opinion

Counting On Others

It's been said time and again: success in the online adult industry is built upon the personal relationships we build with our peers. But is trusting the operation, profitability, or reputation of your own business to others a wise thing to do?

Whether it's a traffic trade that didn't materialize, a phone call or email that wasn't returned, a sponsor payout that was never received, or any of the million and one other things that we as adult Webmasters are promised – and expect – but never receive; being in this business for any length of time will make you well acquainted with that pesky, nagging emotion: "disappointment." The reason for this all too frequent (and all too frequently unnecessary) disappointment? Having to rely on others...

Let's face it; if we could do it all ourselves, we probably would. As the old saying goes, "If you want a job done right, you've got to do it yourself!" But the fact of the matter is that running a successful operation in today's market often takes the co-operation of a dedicated team; whether in-house, out-sourced, or simply "catch as catch can."

Depending on your situation, you may be fortunate enough to have a close-knit cadre of responsible, reliable, dedicated, and motivated associates on staff – folks that you can rely on when the chips are down and the pressure is on. Or, and much more likely, you are forced to make do with the best help you can attract – and afford. And if you're a one man (or woman) operation counting on the help that you might receive from other adult Webmasters that you've met on the industry message boards or through other networking channels, you might be in for a real surprise – especially if you consider that those who you're expecting help from are most likely in the same situation as yourself; similarly needy of real assistance, similarly short of time, and similarly overwhelmed...

In my own particular case, as the editor of an online publication that requires daily updates, my biggest problem involving disappointment when counting on others to do as they promised involves the actual delivery of articles for publication here at XBiz. Quite frankly, if I had a dollar for every article that I was promised but that never materialized, I wouldn't necessarily be all that much richer – but you'd be reading something else today!

So where does the problem lie? While it's easy to say "What do you expect in an industry full of unreliable scumbags?" The fact of the matter is that while we might have more 'scumbags' in our business than many other industry's need to contend with, we also have some of the nicest, most helpful individuals, as well as some of the best and brightest minds in the world working in our arena. In either case, these people are just that – people. People with emotions, and emotional issues. People "with better things to do" than jump at our beck and call. People who should know better than to promise what they can't (or won't) deliver...

At the end of the day, we can all do a better job of what's expected of us – unless we're simply unwilling to do so – in which case, we shouldn't be offering our help, promising what we can't (or won't) deliver, and raising expectations in others. Take care of yourselves, and deliver what you promise. ~ Stephen

Copyright © 2026 Adnet Media. All Rights Reserved. XBIZ is a trademark of Adnet Media.
Reproduction in whole or in part in any form or medium without express written permission is prohibited.

More Articles

opinion

Pornnhub's Jade Talks Trust and Community

If you’ve ever interacted with Jade at Pornhub, you already know one thing to be true: Whether you’re coordinating an event, confirming deliverables or simply trying to get an answer quickly, things move more smoothly when she’s involved. Emails get answered. Details are confirmed. Deadlines don’t drift. And through it all, her tone remains warm, friendly and grounded.

Women In Adult ·
opinion

Outlook 2026: Industry Execs Weigh In on Strategy, Monetization and Risk

The adult industry enters 2026 at a moment of concentrated change. Over the past year, the sector’s evolution has accelerated. Creators have become full-scale businesses, managing branding, compliance, distribution and community under intensifying competition. Studios and platforms are refining production and business models in response to pressures ranging from regulatory mandates to shifting consumer preferences.

Jackie Backman ·
opinion

How Platforms Can Tap AI to Moderate Content at Scale

Every day, billions of posts, images and videos are uploaded to platforms like Facebook, Instagram, TikTok and X. As social media has grown, so has the amount of content that must be reviewed — including hate speech, misinformation, deepfakes, violent material and coordinated manipulation campaigns.

Christoph Hermes ·
opinion

What DSA and GDPR Enforcement Means for Adult Platforms

Adult platforms have never been more visible to regulators than they are right now. For years, the industry operated in a gray zone: enormous traffic, massive data volume and minimal oversight. Those days are over.

Corey D. Silverstein ·
opinion

Making the Case for Network Tokens in Recurring Billing

A declined transaction isn’t just a technical error; it’s lost revenue you fought hard to earn. But here’s some good news for adult merchants: The same technology that helps the world’s largest subscription services smoothly process millions of monthly subscriptions is now available to you as well.

Jonathan Corona ·
opinion

Navigating Age Verification Laws Without Disrupting Revenue

With age verification laws now firmly in place across multiple markets, merchants are asking practical questions: How is this affecting traffic? What happens during onboarding? Which approaches are proving workable in real payment flows?

Cathy Beardsley ·
opinion

How Adult Businesses Can Navigate Global Compliance Demands

The internet has made the world feel small. Case in point: Adult websites based in the U.S. are now getting letters from regulators demanding compliance with foreign laws, even if they don’t operate in those countries. Meanwhile, some U.S. website operators dealing with the patchwork of state-level age verification laws have considered incorporating offshore in the hopes of avoiding these new obligations — but even operators with no physical presence in the U.S. have been sued or threatened with claims for not following state AV laws.

Larry Walters ·
opinion

Top Tips for Bulletproof Creator Management Contracts

The creator management business is booming. Every week, it seems, a new agency emerges, promising to turn creators into stars, automate their fan interactions or triple their revenue through “secret” social strategies. The reality? Many of these agencies are operating with contracts that wouldn’t survive a single serious dispute — if they even have contracts at all.

Corey D. Silverstein ·
opinion

Building Sustainable Revenue Without Opt-Out Cross-Sales

Over the past year, we’ve seen growing pushback from acquirers on merchants using opt-out cross-sales — also known as negative option offers. This has been especially noticeable in the U.S. In fact, one of our acquirers now declines new merchants during onboarding if an opt-out flow is detected. Existing merchants submitting new URLs with opt-out cross-sales are being asked to remove them.

Cathy Beardsley ·
opinion

How to Handle Payment Disputes Without Sacrificing Trust

You can run the best-managed and most compliant website out there, but that still doesn’t completely shield you from the risks tied to payment disputes. Buyer’s remorse, an unclear billing description or even a simple misunderstanding can lead a customer to dispute a transaction. Accumulate enough disputes, and both your reputation and revenue could be at risk.

Jonathan Corona ·
Show More