It’s incredibly frustrating.
You’re trying to sell legal, helpful products to consenting adults — yet the internet treats those products like a problem. The viral success every brand dreams of can seem maddeningly elusive when search engines block or restrict common keywords, social feeds shadow-ban PG posts, review bots misread images and policies shift overnight with no notice.
My rule: If a middle-schooler would instantly understand the sexual context, your ad is too explicit.
All of which raises the key question: How do you market sex toys online when you can’t even properly name, show or describe them?
Despite these barriers, marketing adult products is not an impossible feat, provided you know a few tricks. In today’s world, that means a mix of craft and caution: Speak clearly without saying a forbidden word, “show” a product without revealing it in a way that might set off alarm bells — and build three backup plans in case the first two fail.
A quick caveat: The tips below apply to Google Ads and social media marketing, not to SEO. On your website, you should definitely continue to use the actual words people search for!
With that clarification, here’s how to survive online censorship and reach your target audience.
What Censorship Looks Like Day to Day
Obviously, there’s not some pinch-faced, disapproving judge out there, declaring your posts and campaigns to be smut. If there was, at least you could try to argue with an actual person. Instead, the censorship that adult brands and products have to grapple with comes in the form of automated systems clumsily enforcing clumsy rules. Here are some key bottlenecks where you might get stuck:
- Search ads: Words like “dildo,” “vibrator,” “penis,” “vagina” and even terms like “ED” often lead to Google Ads disapproval or reduced reach. Aggravatingly, an ad might be approved one morning and flagged the next afternoon, making it impossible to plan consistently.
- Social media: Facebook, Instagram and TikTok over-police sexual wellness. I’ve seen completely PG content — no nudity, no product — removed as “adult solicitation.” I’ve also seen LGBTQ+ joy flagged more often than similar straight content.
- Permanent memory: Platforms keep internal strike histories. Once your page receives a few dings, the bots return more frequently and aggressively.
Sometimes you can appeal. Sometimes it even works. But response times can vary widely — and in the meantime, your campaign sits dark.
Strategic Word Games
Fortunately, you can still thrive by building systems that keep your content truthful, compliant and discoverable. When a particular word is too risky to include, talk about outcomes and use cases. For instance:
- Instead of “dildo,” say “internal massager” or “internal toy.”
- Instead of “vibrator,” say “rechargeable wand.”
- Instead of “erectile dysfunction,” say “support for firm, lasting performance.”
- Instead of “lube,” say “water-based gel.”
- Instead of “cock ring,” say “vibrating ring.”
While this degree of euphemism might make it feel like we’re returning to an archaic age of nudge-nudge advertising, these adaptations are unfortunately necessary if you want exposure on today’s most high-value platforms.
MAPIT: A Framework for Vetting Your Content
I run the following five-step checklist on every ad, page and post.
1. Map intent. Approximate your target user’s likely search language, using the same words you think they are apt to use. Then, translate the intent, minus and trigger phrases. For example, if you expect potential shoppers to search “best vibrator for beginners,” translate that to “beginner-friendly five-inch vibrating toy.” That’s your North Star.
2. Abstract the language. Swap banned nouns for safer ones such as “tool,” “massager,” “attachment,” “ring,” “sleeve” or “kit.” Swap “anal” for words such as “back door” or even “booty.” You can get creative with this one as long as it’s a close enough synonym. Note: Keep strong verbs and descriptions of a product’s benefits.
3. Prove value safely. Lead with neutral features: body-safe silicone, rechargeable, water-resistant, whisper-quiet, warranty, returns.
4. Imply with imagery. AI is now well-versed in identifying the shape of most sex toys, so use hands, packaging, texture close-ups, line art and lifestyle context to get your point across.
5. Trailhead CTAs. Provide clear call-to-action (CTA) paths — such as “Compare Internal Toys,” “Size & Fit Guide” and “Learn More” — that lead shoppers to your site. There, you can create education hubs that treat adults like adults, so they can view and read about the product in full, without coded language or coy visual hints.
The MAPIT framework can help you keep bots happy while also providing content humans can understand. My rule: If a middle-schooler would instantly understand the sexual context, your ad is too explicit. Aim for “a calm adult tool that belongs on a nightstand,” not “Wink-wink!”
Social Survival in the Age of Meta
Even PG adult brands get flagged on Instagram and Facebook. You can certainly market on more adult-friendly platforms like X and Reddit, but if you’re not also on Instagram, Facebook and TikTok — which is even stricter than Meta on censorship — then you’re missing out on thousands of potential new customers, as well as the chance to build trust with your current audience.
To help navigate the gauntlet of social media restrictions, try the following:
1. Map intent. Approximate your target user’s likely search language, using the same words you think they are apt to use. Then, translate the intent, minus and trigger phrases. For example, if you expect potential shoppers to search “best vibrator for beginners,” translate that to “beginner-friendly five-inch vibrating toy.” That’s your North Star.
2. Abstract the language. Swap banned nouns for safer ones such as “tool,” “massager,” “attachment,” “ring,” “sleeve” or “kit.” Swap “anal” for words such as “back door” or even “booty.” You can get creative with this one as long as it’s a close enough synonym. Note: Keep strong verbs and descriptions of a product’s benefits.
3. Prove value safely. Lead with neutral features: body-safe silicone, rechargeable, water-resistant, whisper-quiet, warranty, returns.
4. Imply with imagery. AI is now well-versed in identifying the shape of most sex toys, so use hands, packaging, texture close-ups, line art and lifestyle context to get your point across.
5. Trailhead CTAs. Provide clear call-to-action (CTA) paths — such as “Compare Internal Toys,” “Size & Fit Guide” and “Learn More” — that lead shoppers to your site. There, you can create education hubs that treat adults like adults, so they can view and read about the product in full, without coded language or coy visual hints.
You will also want to assess where you are willing to draw the line when it comes to accommodating platforms’ peculiar requirements. For instance, I will not drop LGBTQ+ or sexual wellness content because bots misread it. If it is not explicit, I will appeal, document and continue to post.
Selling sex toys isn’t always saucy. Sometimes it’s about spreadsheets, policy PDFs and rewriting one sentence five times until it makes sense to a human and can also squeak past a bot. It’s tough work, but once you see the ROI, it’s definitely worth it.
Hail Groo is the director of PR and marketing for Forward Approach Marketing, where they combine their background as a public historian with over a decade of expertise in diverse marketing fields. Beyond their work in PR and marketing, Hail is a published travel writer, magazine contributor, podcast guest, award-winning photographer and Colorado-based journalist.
