Each month, industry news media organization XBIZ spotlights the career accomplishments and outstanding contributions of Women in Adult. WIA profiles offer an intimate look at the professional lives of the industry's most influential female executives.
Lora DiCarlo has become the sextech winner that was, and then wasn’t, and then was all over again. For CEO Lora Haddock, this series of events could describe her recent CES award fiasco, or just another day at the office.
We can’t just ignore women’s sexual wellness while accepting male focused sex robots and erectile dysfunction drugs.
According to Haddock, running a sextech company is a juggling act, emotional roller-coaster and adrenaline junkie high, often within a 24-hour period.
If you haven’t been following the news, here’s a snippet of what you’ve been missing. Haddock’s Lora DiCarlo brand and her techy wonder toy, Osé — a dual-stim toy that promises the best blended orgasms — were bestowed with the Innovation Award at the 2019 Consumer Electronics Show. The award was rescinded for being “too obscene” a short time later, though after the press blew the story to epic proportions, Haddock’s award was quickly handed back.
Freshly pumped up from the CES triumph, Haddock now looks to the future, as the official launch of Osé looms near. We thought we’d give Haddock a much-deserved, extra push of positive vibes with another special recognition — by spotlighting her as Woman of the Month.
Haddock responded with a few good stories and a peek into the private moment that inspired the next big sextech toy boom.
XBIZ: What initially led you to the sexual wellness field?
Lora Haddock: My background is actually in medicine. I had been in healthcare for over a decade. I’ve always had a passion for understanding human beings, but it was my interest in sexual wellness that brought me to sextech. I became fascinated with the psychological, physiological and anatomical aspects of the female orgasm, so when I left healthcare and impending med school, I decided I wanted to create something for the perfect orgasm for every body.
XBIZ: Tell us about the defining moment that made you realize sex toy design was something you had to explore.
Haddock: Well, to be honest, it all started with a really mind-blowing blended orgasm a few years ago. I literally slid off the bed, landing halfway on the floor. Yeah, it was good. I remember thinking “How do I do that again?!” Remembering my partner still sitting on the bed, I added, “Ok. How do I do that again...by myself?”
The reality is often you need a really talented partner or you need to juggle the perfect combination of toys — and neither of those are easy to come by. The idea for Osé grew out of that realization; how to create sensations and experiences that feel like a real partner, and to create something that truly adapted to real human anatomy — not just approximated to fit 50-60 percent of vaginas and vulvas. There just wasn’t anything out there like that.
I made it somewhat of a personal mission to understand the variance in female sexual anatomy, which involved me literally asking friends, then acquaintances, then complete strangers about their anatomy. I even put together a survey and a full list of instructions, “How to Find Your G-Spot!” It was the response that hooked me; people wanted to talk about sex, about pleasure, about the idea I was cooking up, and, more importantly, when they could buy it. It was then that the epiphany hit me — this could work! So I started sketches, and eventually 3D drafting and listing out the engineering requirements I would need to engineer such a piece of avant garde tech. Then I took 52 functional engineering specifications to Oregon State University and pitched the idea to the would-be head of the Product Development Lab at OSU.
Though I didn’t know it at the time, that was just the beginning of an insane adventure that would put Lora DiCarlo and Osé on the map.
XBIZ: Looking back, what sticks out in your mind about the early days of building your brand?
Haddock: One of the most memorable things for me was staying up until 2 a.m. with our CFO and our director of sales and marketing, Sarah Brown, to finalize our website the night before CES. We were expecting a moderate reaction to our open letter to the CTA, but by noon the next day it had blown up beyond anything we could have anticipated. We had so much support from the industry itself but also from people all across the spectrum in mainstream media, tech and business. It was a very humbling experience that made all the anxiety, blood, sweat and (a lot of) tears worth it and has kept us going over the last seven months. I am constantly humbled by the support and excitement we experience at every event, every talk I give, every newsletter we send, and every conversation we have.
XBIZ: Who deserves the credit for helping you achieve your career goals along the way?
Haddock: I have been very lucky to have amazing mentors throughout my career, regardless of the industry. I have to admit, my mother is the strongest warrior I know and some of the folks changing the game and changing policies (Cecile Richards, Alice Walker, RBG, AOC, Martine Rothblatt) stoke that fire to do the same. But I have been so inspired and grateful for the support I’ve received from all of the other unbelievable female, femme and non-binary founders and retail professionals in the industry who have been out here making the space more inclusive, more profitable, and frankly more fun and enjoyable.
XBIZ: How would you describe the experience of heading up a sextech company?
Haddock: It’s like piloting a rocket ship, drinking from a fire hose, trying to perfect the grilled cheese sandwich, while coordinating a cross-country road trip. All at once. In the best possible way.
XBIZ: The CES award incident has become a lighthouse of sorts for your brand. You must have some interesting stories surrounding this wild turn of events. Could you share the best one?
Haddock: My favorite so far was when our team attended the Showstoppers Press event during CES. This was just a day or so after we broke the CES gender-bias story about our robotics award being revoked because Osé was deemed too “obscene” by the CTA. We had such amazing support from everyone at the event.
At the end of the evening, when everyone was exhilarated and obscenely exhausted a gentleman walked up to me with a wide grin on his face. He extended his hand, grinned a little wider; clearly hoping I would shake his hand. Furrowing my brow, I met his gaze and put my right hand in his and squeezed. “Congratulations, Miss Haddock. Lora DiCarlo has been selected as the winner of the IHS Market Innovation Award for Robotics and Drones.” He beamed as he pulled a glass award from behind his back, still holding my grip, he leaned in and whispered, “I promise we won’t take this one back from you.”
I nearly fell to the floor while yelling at my team who were scattered in all directions.
Even more amusing was that Sarah Brown gently pulled the award away and danced like Tinkerbell around the entire section of the hall taking photos and sing-songing that we won. That last part might have been my favorite, actually.
XBIZ: What do you think this chaotic string of events — being granted the CES award, having it revoked, and then re-instated — has to say about sextech and how it’s mixing with the mainstream tech world?
Haddock: We had such an unbelievably positive reaction from every single corner when we broke the story about CES revoking our Innovation Award. People were and are rooting for us — we had over 250 pieces of coverage in the first few weeks after we released the open letter, and more than double that when we got it back. Everyone from The New York Times to Vogue to Mashable and even Breitbart covered it in a neutral tone (no, we did not read the comments).
Consumers and media recognize the nonsensical bias that is present in so many of the decisions being made to block sexual wellness and education in all of its forms. It’s old-fashioned gatekeeping that doesn’t represent the direction society is going — we can’t just ignore women’s sexual wellness while accepting male focused sex robots and erectile dysfunction drugs.
We got our award returned to us with an apology from the CTA in May, but what was more important to my team and me was seeing real change in the tech industry and at CES specifically. The award is a nice gesture after months of back and forth, but we’re here to make it better for everyone and push innovation forward — regardless of the industry. The fact that the CTA asked us to help them update their official policies to be more inclusive is, to me, a great step in the right direction and an indication of the bright potential future sextech has in the tech space, but we’re still keen to see how everything is implemented at the show itself in 2020.
I also think that Dame Products’ brave stand in their lawsuit against the MTA is a perfect next step in pushing back against the gender bias and gatekeeping that’s still prevalent in traditional spaces like media, business, and tech. I sent Alex Fine a message the moment we read the news, exclaiming our love and support; reading that news struck a chord of honor and indignation in my team and myself. Organizations like the CTA and the MTA have an opportunity to be those pioneers and thought leaders destigmatizing sex and sextech and recognizing the clearly worthy and valid tech that already drives innovation forward and improves human lives.
XBIZ: How have you observed the pleasure space grow and change in recent years? Are we headed in the right direction?
Haddock: The biggest change in the pleasure industry I’ve seen since I started out is the shift towards more gender diversity in the space. More females have been claiming their space in sextech (and in many other industries), not just accepting the status quo, but stepping in and saying, “I can do this better.” And it’s happening in companies at every level; we’re founding new business, taking over the C-suite, becoming directors, sitting on boards — and we’re taking the quality of business to the next level. Whether it’s making the products that consumers actually want, to creating marketing that doesn’t objectify or alienate consumers, working with each other to ensure that the face and body of the industry looks more and more like the consumer who is making the purchase.
I think that’s the direction we need to be and already are going in and it is bringing diversity of all kinds into our companies. Hiring people who have different experiences than us, who don’t look like us, aren’t from the same place. The more differentiating perspectives you amass in the development process, the more likely you are to create something that appeals to a wider group of people — whether it’s product, marketing, PR, merchandising or anything really. That’s what is going to help us destigmatize the sextech space and open up the floodgates to better education and more pleasure without shame.
XBIZ: Give us a peek into the exciting events coming up, both inside and outside of the Lora Dicarlo offices. What can the pleasure industry look forward to this year?
Haddock: Our first product, Osé, is launching at the end of this year — so that’s what we’re focusing on right now. It’s the first hands-free dual stimulator that feels like a real partner. We are using micro-robotics to simulate the sensations of a mouth, tongue and fingers.
Something I get ramped up about, personally, is speaking at public events and conferences; I’ve been on stage quite a bit this year and the support and curiosity from attendees is heartwarming. It is such an honor to get requests from large entities like Tech Open Air, Forbes, Circular Summit, and even Muse Conference here at home in Bend, Oregon. The next big exciting event? TechCrunch Disrupt in October!
We’re also very excited about CES 2020 — being the brand that gets sextech officially accepted back into CES has been such a huge accomplishment for us so we want to make the most of the event and be part of the debut.
And of course we’re full-steam ahead on our next product launches — I love getting the calls and videos from our engineering team excitedly explaining the new thing they’re working on. But for those delicious new bits of tech, you’ll have to wait and see...
