Researchers Discover Oldest Sex Toy in Germany

TUBINGEN, Germany — It turns out ancient Homo sapiens weren’t just busy inventing the wheel. 

Researchers at the University of Tubingen in Germany believe they have found the oldest sex toy — a 30,000 year-old siltstone phallus that doubled as a tool to start fires.

The prehistoric dildo was found in a cave in germany and pieced together from more than 12 fragments, reports say. Researchers deduced its dual purpose by observing 1) a ridge etched onto one end, resembling the crown of a penis and 2) scrape marks where flints had been struck against it to produce a flame. 

Estimated to be at least 28,000 years old, German researchers have linked the sex toy/tool with primitive Homo sapiens rather than their less intelligent Neanderthals cohorts.

They also noted that representations of the male form from that period are rare, while depictions of females are much more common.