Big Teaze ‘Duckies’ Seized From Italian Department Store

FLORENCE, Italy — Italian authorities seized a collection of Big Teaze vibrating “duckies” from a local department store following customer complaint that the items were not properly labeled adults-only.

Big Teaze President Tony Levine told XBIZ the Paris vibrating duck and several other items were taken off display in the Coin Street Calzioni women’s lingerie department, and he and his team were alerted by its Italian distributor.

“We were somewhat surprised as Europeans tend to be perceived as more open-minded,” Levine said. “However, I think we more astonished at the fact that it was Paris. We might expect this type of mischief from Red Devil Duckie, but come on now, Paris?”

Paris is shaped like a traditional rubber duckie toy, decorated with rhinestones and feather accessories that are meant to put a fun and elegant twist on a traditional vibrator.

“We were in utter disbelief to learn Paris had been taken into custody and being held against her bill — er, I mean will,” Levine said. “Paris is known for her innocent eyes, elegance and discreet appearance. And besides, what's so threatening about a duck anyways?”

According to Italian news sources, the display of adult items was in violation of a new erotic sales regulation, which among other things prohibits the sale of adult products within 200 meters of a school, place of worship or similar location.

Upon responding to the customer’s initial complaint, authorities found the department store was located close to a church.

“We want to thank Paris fans everywhere and are moved by the outpouring of love and support we are receiving from around the world,” Levine said. “Apparently, this tragic event has ruffled feathers on an international level.”

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