Spreadsheets App 'Gamifies' the Bedroom

CYBERSPACE — New app Spreadsheets “gamifies” intimate experiences by using statistical and historical feedback recorded through users' iPhones to monitor — and try to improve — their sexual performance.

According to the app’s website, Spreadsheets “monitors data from user’s movement and audio levels through the accelerometer and microphone to provide statistical and visual analysis of their performance in bed."

It continues: “Spreadsheets does not record or playback audio or video. That would be creepy.”

Some of the quantitative measurements include thrusts made per minute, duration of intercourse and even how loud you and your partner moan (measured in decibels).

“Based on all these things, if you're having sex for a long time and it’s rigorous and you're making loud noises, the app assumes you’re probably having pretty good sex,”said Justin Yu, co-host of CNET’s 404 show online.

“I guess you somehow have to have the phone strapped to your naked body in order to guage these things,” he added.

The information recorded isn’t relayed, backed up or synced to the Internet, but the creators point out that couples looking to become pregnant could share it with their doctor, or the health conscious with their nutritionist (after all, it burns calories).  

The app is currently available through the iTunes App Store for $1.99 through August. Following August, the price will jump to $2.99.

 Unfortunately, Spreadsheets answers the FAQ “Will Spreadsheets get me laid?” in the negative.

“No, Spreadsheets is not an escort service. It is also not a great pickup line, or maybe it is; in which case you should tell us your success story on our Facebook page or Twitter feed,” the full reply reads.

Related:  

Copyright © 2025 Adnet Media. All Rights Reserved. XBIZ is a trademark of Adnet Media.
Reproduction in whole or in part in any form or medium without express written permission is prohibited.

More News

Hentaied Founder Romero 'Mr. Alien' on Fetish, Fantasy and Finding Order in Chaos

A sharp sting pierces the woman’s skin. Something foreign slips beneath the surface. Eggs, maybe. She doesn’t know it yet, but soon her body will become a vessel, a hive, a source of contamination.

AEBN Publishes Popular Searches for July, August

AEBN has published the top search terms for the months of July and August from its straight and gay theaters in all 50 states and the District of Columbia.

The Guardian Devotes Feature Article to XBIZ Amsterdam

British newspaper The Guardian sent a reporter to cover XBIZ Amsterdam earlier this month, resulting in a lengthy article about the annual European adult industry conference.

Pineapple Support Taps Char Borley as Brand Ambassador

Pineapple Support has named Char Borley as its newest brand ambassador.

Michigan Legislators Propose Online Porn Ban

Michigan lawmakers have introduced a bill that would make it illegal to distribute pornography via the internet in the state.

Florida AG Sues Aylo, Segpay Over State AV Law

Florida Attorney General James Uthmeier filed lawsuits against Aylo and Segpay on Monday with the 12th Judicial Circuit Court of Florida for noncompliance with HB3, the state's age verification law.

Colombian Court Sides with Performer Esperanza Goméz Over IG Suspensions

Colombia’s Constitutional Court last week ruled in favor of adult performer Esperanza Gómez in her legal battle against Meta over repeated suspensions of her Instagram account.

Missouri AG Announces Age Verification Rule to Take Effect Nov. 30

Newly appointed Missouri Attorney General Catherine Hanaway announced Friday that the state's recently approved age verification regulation for adult websites will go into effect on Nov. 30.

Aylo, Woodhull Freedom Foundation to Tackle Online Censorship in Virtual Seminar

Aylo and Woodhull Freedom Foundation will co-host a virtual panel addressing online censorship on Sept. 30.

Severe Sex Films Relaunches Site Through YourPaysitePartner

Severe Sex Films has relaunched its official website through YourPaysitePartner (YPP).

Show More