opinion

A Virtual Production: How I Directed Adult Time's 'Cougar Queen' Remotely

A Virtual Production: How I Directed Adult Time's 'Cougar Queen' Remotely

Busty and blonde, dressed in leopard print and cutoffs, Jill Erotic paces back and forth across an overgrown field with a manic energy that makes her seem as nutty as a fruitcake.

“What? My wives love me!” she rants. “They can’t get enough of this pussy! You want to see it?!”

The amazing writers at Gamma came up with a story timeline, as well as individual character breakdowns, based on the events in “Tiger King.”

Jill drops her shorts, leans against a log and begins masturbating with the same intensity.

“Yeah, that’s good! That pussy smells like fresh laundry!”

When Gamma told me they had already been in touch with Serene Siren about playing the lead in our parody of the hit Netflix series “Tiger King,” I couldn’t imagine anyone better, but I honestly didn’t realize how perfect a fit it was until we started shooting.

Conceived as a high-concept project to be shot within the restrictions of quarantine via Zoom, I knew “Cougar Queen” wasn’t going to be an easy shoot for anyone. But Serene and the rest of my amazing cast dived in head first, and I think we made something really topical, really funny and really sexy.

The amazing writers at Gamma came up with a story timeline, as well as individual character breakdowns, based on the events in “Tiger King.” Joe Exotic became Jill Erotic (Serene Siren), Carole Baskin became Cheryl Badsin (Cherie Deville), Doc Antle became Dot Scandal (Reagan Foxx) and so on.

Then we got to work. “Cougar Queen” isn’t “Zoom: The Porno.” There is one video chat in the project — it’s a really fun bit — but the rest of the project is traditionally shot. We used Zoom as a way for me to direct and interact with the actors, but it was all shot on cell phones with FilmicPro, using the equipment the girls already had at home.

It went like this: My partner Eli Cross and I would get on a Zoom call with the performer — or performers, since we hired a couple of roommates to do g/g scenes. They’d be ready to shoot — hair and makeup done, wardrobe mostly selected, everything with logos removed from their living room — and we’d talk through lighting and camera settings, then start working our way through the script.

It was a lot like playing a video game, except I didn’t have the controls. I could see the screen, but the talent had the controller. There was a lot of “up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, A, B…” “A, B?” “Yes, A, B, now press start!”

I couldn’t have done it without all the hard work from my actors. I so sincerely appreciate their patience with me as I figured out how to communicate via the internet. They seemed to enjoy it.

“I loved working on ‘Cougar Queen!’” Cherie later told me. “I don’t often get to do comedy scripts, so I had a blast bringing Cheryl Badsin to life! This was the first feature movie I have done from quarantine.”

It was a first for me too. I’m very much a hands-on, “walk around and point at stuff” director, so I had to learn a new vernacular to direct via Zoom. Most of my actors were very used to self-shooting at this point, so I relied on them a lot to tell me what looked good.

“Working on ‘Cougar Queen’ was amazing!” according to Serene, whom I spoke with about her experiences. “It felt so wild and fun and creative! Being directed that way really helped me get into my role and let me go as big as I wanted to with the character. I thought working virtually would be more difficult, but the team was wonderfully patient with me and it was pretty easy-breezy! My role was 100% improv, little clips of embodying the lifestyle of a wild lesbian porn mogul.”

It’s sweet of Serene to say, but the fact is, I just wound her up and let her do her thing. She had a better handle on her character than I or anyone else did.

Another of my stars I can’t thank enough is Kira Noir. She shared her experiences with me, explaining, “Having a virtual director somehow made me a little nervous, but we had a great time giggling every time I came so hard I almost fell out of my little chair. The storyline I had was really silly, and I’m excited to see what everyone else did too!”

Kira was definitely a rock star. Hers was one of the first scenes we shot, and she came up with major plot points in her improv that we then wrote in all throughout the show. She was brilliant.

Once we got all the footage we needed, we used the file transfer service MASV to get the files from the actors. It’s a foolproof software, and the girls could upload right from their phone with a few clicks.

Then the footage was off to Montreal, where it was in the hands of Woody All-In, our amazing editor.

Ultimately, though, as Cherie said, “While it was amazing getting to see you and Aaliyah Love on Zoom, it made me miss getting to be in the same room as my friends and co-workers! My only hope will be for a wrap party when it is safe to do so.”

I wholeheartedly agree.

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