Al Goldstein Announces U.S. Presidential Candidacy

NEW YORK — Al Goldstein, the former publisher of Screw magazine, has announced his candidacy for the President of the U.S.

Goldstein, who three years ago was homeless, now writes a blog sponsored by adult search engine Booble.com. Booble President Bob Smart will act as Goldstein's campaign manager.

"Al Goldstein is a national treasure," Smart said. "As the world's dirtiest old man, Al has something to say about the world he helped create, and we Americans have a duty to listen."

Goldstein said he figures after having gone to bed with 7,000 women in his career, he's something of an expert at screwing people, which gives him "ideal experience" for the nation's top job.

A self-proclaimed champion of the 1st Amendment — having been arrested 17 times for obscenity — Goldstein said he has a New Yorker's rage at Republican anti-sex, pro-war policies. On the gay marriage issue, he also said he believes homosexuals "should be as miserable as heterosexual people."

Despite his jokes, Goldstein assures skeptics that his candidacy is not a joke.

"I hope to be funny, without being a joke," he said. "My whole life has led me to this moment. I only want to make people smile, and maybe think a little bit before they vote."

Goldstein also said he hopes his candidacy will attract sponsors. Currently running as a democrat, Goldstein may switch to independent because of money issues.

"Without another sponsor," Smart said, "we can't afford to travel Al to the relevant campaign stops ... so we may instead wage an independent campaign, focused on the Internet, radio and the big porn shows, where Al's mostly likely voters will congregate."

Goldstein was once owner of adult studio Milky Way Productions and adult publication Screw magazine but filed for bankruptcy in 2003, leaving roughly $1 million in debt. After moving between homeless shelters and friends' couches, he now lives off of Social Security and recently wrote an autobiography entitled, "I Goldstein."

Copyright © 2025 Adnet Media. All Rights Reserved. XBIZ is a trademark of Adnet Media.
Reproduction in whole or in part in any form or medium without express written permission is prohibited.

More News

Leilani Li Fronts Latest From Brazzers

Leilani Li stars with Jayden Marcos in the latest release from Brazzers, titled "Soap Her Up & Spread That Ass."

BranditScan Launches '25 Days of Christmas' Promo

BranditScan has launched its 25 Days of Christmas promotion.

MelRose Michaels Named Host of Online Industry Edition of XBIZ Honors

Performer and entrepreneur MelRose Michaels will MC the online edition of the 2026 XBIZ Honors, set for Wednesday, Jan. 14, at the Kimpton Everly Hotel in Hollywood.

Irish Regulator: EU States to Ramp Up AV Enforcement for Smaller Sites

A representative of Irish media regulator Coimisiún na Meán told legislators that Ireland and other EU states are preparing to expand enforcement of age verification regulations to include smaller adult sites, British newspaper The Times is reporting.

Hailey Rose Stars in Elegant Angel's New Feature 'Gamer Girls Behaving Badly'

Multi-XMAs winner Hailey Rose stars in the new feature from Elegant Angel, titled “Gamer Girls Behaving Badly.”

Brazzers Premieres Limited Comedy Series 'Glory House'

Cubbi Thompson, Kira Noir, Isa Bella, and Luna Star lead the latest release from Brazzers, titled "Glory House."

Lilly Bell, Charlie Forde Star in Latest 'UpClose VR' From Adult Time

Reigning Girl/Girl Performer of the Year Lilly Bell and Charlie Forde star with Isiah Maxwell in the latest episode of Adult Time series "UpClose VR."

Krystal Sparks Leads Latest From MYLF

Krystal Sparks stars with Mike Mancini in the latest release from MYLF, titled “A Good Tradwife Always Drains Her Husband’s Balls Dry.”

Anissa Kate, Katie Kush Topline Latest 'Lesbian Anal' From Sweetheart Video

Anissa Kate and Katie Kush headline "Lesbian Anal 8," from Mile High Media studio imprint Sweetheart Video.

Evil Angel Drops Angelo Godshack's 'Squirting Wars'

Evil Angel has released director Angelo Godshack’s “Squirting Wars.”

Show More