Home > News > Canned American Apparel CEO Gets Sex Tape Offer from WoodRocket • Bookmark   • Newsletters   • Register Search Options

NEWS STORY

Canned American Apparel CEO Gets Sex Tape Offer from WoodRocket

Canned American Apparel CEO Gets Sex Tape Offer from WoodRocket
Get XBIZ News
Jun 20, 2014 9:45 AM PDT    Text size: 

WOODLAND HILLS, Calif. — With the dismissal of American Apparel CEO Dov Charney making national headlines — and trending on Facebook — WoodRocket.com has penned an open letter extending an offer to Charney to star in his own celebrity sex tape.

Charney led a contentious reign at the L.A.-based hipster clothing empire, battling several accusations of sexual harassment and other misconduct. While board members said they ousted Charney due to ongoing misconduct investigations, they did not cite specific examples for the final boot.  

WoodRocket honcho Lee Roy Myers wrote:

Dear Dov,

We are sorry to hear about your American Apparel job loss. We don't want to bring you down though. From now on we will just refer to American Apparel as the “A-words”. It's a tough job market out there and you will need all of the positivity you can muster when applying for a new gig. Or will you?

Dov Charney, hold on to your $30 unisex mineral wash denim cap, have we got an offer for you! We here at WoodRocket.com applaud your bravery in the face of unemployment and your enthusiasm for walking around your office in your $35 cotton spandex mens underwear. What other job in America will allow you to get away with that? I'll tell you who! Us! That's who!

Your clothing made you rich. Your billboards made you notorious. Your reputation will now make you a star! A porn star! On a WoodRocket.com celebrity sex tape! This may sound familiar, but we would like to offer you the opportunity to pose unnecessarily provocatively. If you can look super young, that would be a bonus.

We don't want to sound hypocritical. I mean, we make porn for goodness' sake. It doesn't get any dirtier than us. Sure, we don't use our shoots to connect sexuality to youth. And hey, we tend to promote the message that people of all races and cultures and body types and sexual preferences can be beautiful and sexy and hip. Also, we don't think acid washed anything should come back in style. But we think we have got an offer that someone with your particular “tastes” might appreciate.

We want to put you in an adult movie. You can wear your underwear and a $30 unisex graphic T-shirt that has a picture of a cat and some slogan about L.A. being “Purrfect.” But eventually we will need to see your nipples and genitals. Hey, we got stuff to sell! We'll throw in some spread eagle shots, some killer dialogue like, “Do you know who I am?” and “I'm so young and sexy, you should buy my socks,” and then some sex. In exchange, we will pay you in $50 giraffe print neon leggings and the opportunity that comes with celebrity sex tape stardom. Maybe one day you can be as big as Teen Mom.

Please let us know if you are interested. We anxiously await your response.

Thank you,

Lee Roy Myers

P.S.  Normally I would put my contact information here, but it's an open letter, so any old celebrity could read this and bug me about a sex tape. And I don't need that hassle. So if this interests you, just use the contact link on our website to let me know.

More ways to get XBIZ News:  RSS Feeds  |  E-Newsletters  |  Desktop Widget  |  Mobile
Looking for porn star news and behind-the-scene videos? Check out XFANZ.com !

OPINIONS & VIEWS

Finding the Right Road to Success

Last month, I wrote about collaboration, surrounding yourself with good people and top-tier service providers and having an alliance group. In past articles, I have written about the “7 Ps”:... More »

Differences Between Static, Smart Links

Affiliate marketing, the concept of paying commission for referred business, was employed long before the internet. But just four years after the invention of the World Wide Web, it made the jump into... More »

How to Exploit Video Banner Advertising

The video banner ad format is becoming more and more popular with marketers. Online research company eMarketer states that in the U.S., by 2019 digital ad spending for video banners will rise to $6.82... More »
XBIZ NEWSLETTERS
Stay informed of the latest industry developments. Get XBIZ newsletters delivered to your inbox. Subscribe today!
Enter email address:

* To manage existing subscriptions click here.






POPULAR PRODUCTS & SERVICES
Submit your press release to
multiple news outlets with 1 click.
Subscribe to RSS news feeds or
add free content to your website.
Access XBIZ news and articles
with your mobile device.
Subscribe to XBIZ Premiere magazine, the industry's leading adult retail trade publications, delivering the most timely and comprehensive business news and information to producers and retailers of adult products.

UPCOMING EVENTS

The European Summit

Mar 04 - Mar 07
Barcelona-Sitges, Spain

The TEA Show

Mar 05 - Mar 06
Hollywood, CA

Phoenix Forum 2017

Mar 23 - Mar 26
Tempe, Arizona

EXXXOTICA Denver

Mar 31 - Apr 02
Denver, CO.
Everyday thousands of business professionals browse XBIZ's industry directory for quality products and services. Not listed yet? Your company could be losing potential new business. Submit your company today!
Use XBIZ RSS feeds to stay informed of the latest industry developments or as a content syndication tool for your website!