opinion

Eve of Seduction

Gram Ponante
With the Free Speech Coalition's announcement that the possibly-underage person the FBI has been asking about used the name Seduction and may have also used the name Chantae in adult film performances, lists of titles featuring actresses named Seduction, some of which were produced nine years ago, have surfaced on parts of the web frequented by those interested in news from the adult entertainment industry.

This is not one of those sites. My readers are chiefly concerned with Civil War battle reenactments and artist renderings of Clara Barton salving folds.

The artist known as Seduction may have been born with the name Mieke Michele Jackson, and what is apparent from the various lists is that there have been several adult performers who thought "Seduction" was a good nom de porn.

That is why, more than ever, the Internet Corporation for Assigned Names and Numbers (ICANN) needs to control porn star aliases so poor Tom Hymes isn't chained to his desk in the shadow of the North Hollywood Rite Aid. While there can only be one legal Jenna Jameson, porn stars of lower status end up fighting for a dwindling allotment of names. Here are some names that have not yet been taken, which I am auctioning off:

Blubberzz

Nyarlathothep

Masturbatrix

Brittney Boinkk

Krakken

Ronnie James Dildo

THX1138

The USS Lexington

Vulvalique D'Oreo

Vaginalia von Mumberbleeps

Gonorrhea Perlman

Barring federal oversight, I think the porn community should appoint a Council of Elders who would approve names submitted by potential talent and agents. This council should get free pizza and be allotted a stipend by Adult Industry Medical.

To this council I nominate Bill Margold, Roy Karch, Jay Moyes, and, because other parts of the country are so little represented in the decision-making process and because he has been particularly recognition-seeking the past few days, Mike South.

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