Home > Features > Cytherea's Poetry Corner • Bookmark   • Newsletters   • Register Search Options

FEATURE

Cytherea's Poetry Corner

Cytherea's Poetry Corner

April 28, 2005
Text size: 
Get XBIZ News
XBIZ Research
Will virtual reality boost the paysite market?
Yes, it will soon
  39.66%
Yes, but in a few years
  36.87%
No
  23.46%
Out of 179 votes. Results based on votes submitted by members of XBIZ.net social network.
Porn Star Karaoke didn't have a sponsor Tuesday night, and Sardo's met federal sausage party standards for the first time since I've been attending. The gang from XBiz was there, and thought enough to bring the latest issue of their Variety-esque trade publication, in which resided an article recounting lovingly unpleasant things about Keiko's singing. Hence the evil look I got from Herself as I walked in, despite our tearful reconciliation just one month ago. It's not like I wrote the article...

Later Keiko sang "Black Velvet" by Alannah Miles. It was so exquisite that I think she should change her name to Yay-ko. She was deep in secret counsels with Tod-Hunter all evening, like the Ents with Saruman in better times before the power of the Ring waxed anew.

I was talking with someone who wanted to buy my site (saying "blow me" to a porn star doesn't have the same effect as when you say it to anyone else) when Dick Smothers Jr. took the stage. I admit I wasn't paying much attention, but I think the self-described Orson Welles of Porn twice said something like, "If you don't agree with me, you suck cocks by choice."

If anybody reading this was there and knows what the context was, please let me know.

I was tired and was getting ready to leave when Cytherea showed up.

As you know, working in porn is a life of the mind, and you can't blame me for not knowing how to pronounce this woman's name, despite everything I've read and seen about her ability to send her own ejaculate across the room and knock a cigarette out of a monkey's mouth.

And it wasn't like there's any dialogue in her movies along the lines of

MAN: I would like to put my penis in you in a series of impractical ways, but then come on your face anyway, as if I'm masturbating using you as some kind of bio-sleeve.

CYTHEREA: My name is pronounced Cy-ther'-e-a, like diphtheria but with a sigh instead of a diph.

So I finally learned how to pronounce her name, and she sang a song, and she didn't hose anyone down while pointing her labia at somebody, but that was fine, because one of my major goals in the adult industry had been reached.

Here is an ode to this special night:

I know of a girl named Cytherea

Whose Kegels are hardly inferior

Her long distance squirts

Can moisten your shirt

In Prague while she sits in Siberia


PROFILES & BIOS

NMG’s Megan Stokes Helps Brands Find New Revenue

NMG Management, which helps adult companies find new ways to increase revenue and brand exposure, has some of the industry’s most prominent studios listed as clients. From MetArt to Holly Randall... More »

Cam World: Chaturbate’s Ramona Flour Cultivates Community

Wreathed in a scarlet mane of silky flames, Ramona Flour is a mesmerizing Renaissance woman, her painterly figure gorgeously inked and her savvy intellect sharpened to a witty edge. Artistry pours forth... More »

Cam World: TheaForYou Hypnotizes Audiences on Stripchat

TheaForYou is an exotic mirage of heavenly dreams, dancing through streaming lights whenever she graces the web-cam on Stripchat. Shimmering golden hair crowns her adorable eyes like solar rays spun from... More »
XBIZ NEWSLETTERS
Stay informed of the latest industry developments. Get XBIZ newsletters delivered to your inbox. Subscribe today!
Enter email address:

* To manage existing subscriptions click here.






POPULAR PRODUCTS & SERVICES
Submit your press release to
multiple news outlets with 1 click.
Subscribe to RSS news feeds or
add free content to your website.
Access XBIZ news and articles
with your mobile device.
Subscribe to XBIZ Premiere magazine, the industry's leading adult retail trade publications, delivering the most timely and comprehensive business news and information to producers and retailers of adult products.

UPCOMING EVENTS

XBIZ.net Paysite Meetup

May 04 - May 04
Prague, Czech Republic

Eurowebtainment 2017

May 17 - May 20
Majorca, Spain

XBIZ Retreat

May 30 - Jun 03
Miami, Florida

XBIZ Miami 2017

May 30 - Jun 02
Miami, Florida
Everyday thousands of business professionals browse XBIZ's industry directory for quality products and services. Not listed yet? Your company could be losing potential new business. Submit your company today!
Use XBIZ RSS feeds to stay informed of the latest industry developments or as a content syndication tool for your website!