On Set Report: ‘Not Bewitched XXX’ Cast its Spell

Joanne Cachapero
STUDIO CITY, Calif. — It’s a sunny day in the Valley, in a nice, quiet suburban neighborhood of ‘60s ranch-style homes. One of those homes has the windows blacked out with dark curtains and there are about a dozen fat power cords that go from somewhere in the yard, up the brick walkway and through the front door.

It’s one o’clock on the last day on the set of X-Play’s “Not Bewitched XXX” and director Will Ryder is painfully aware that he only has until midnight to wrap the shoot. Spirits on the set were high, though; magic was in the air for the stellar ensemble cast.

In the backyard, there’s a big, shady tree. Starlet Michelle Avanti is swinging on an old fashioned rope swing, wearing a green floral church dress and ash blonde bouffant wig that looks pretty, but she says is itchy.

Eva Angelina is sitting in a lawn chair next to the pool in a heavy black dress and black pantyhose, with her feet up, talking politics with performer James Bartholet. Aurora Snow is dressed like a belly dancer and reading a book by Kurt Vonnegut.

Performer Jack Lawrence is patiently waiting for his walk-on; he’s playing a cop with a few lines, but no sex today. And Nina Hartley is flitting around in a neon pink, blue and yellow caftan, with a sky-high red wig and outrageous purple eyeshadow, looking like the sexiest-ever version of a ‘60s witch.

“The movie is unbelievable. It’s an insane thing to put together. We just changed Larry Tate into a dog. Endorra is all over the place,” Ryder, aka All Media Play’s Jeff Mullen, laughed. “The thing is we’re not taking ourselves too seriously. We’re trying to create some entertainment, have a little fun.

“It’s a great cast,” he added. “We have a little bit of everything on this set, but we really designed this cast to meet the demands of the porn fan — it’s second to none, and one of the greatest casts ever assembled. I really mean that.”

Mike Horner, who plays Darren in the movie, said that there are only four people on set that are old enough to have seen “Bewitched” when it was originally on TV. “Every television series that’s ever been on should have an X-rated version of it because it already has its own fanbase,” Horner told XBIZ. “All those people go, ‘Jeez, the porn version of my favorite TV show…’

“I’ve done ‘Star Trek’ take-offs, ‘Gilligan’s Island,’ and that’s their selling point,” the veteran actor said. “They’re not really different than a thousand others, but if you’re kind of true to the fans, you’ve got a built-in base. And the porn fans, as long as you give them good sex, that’s good.”

That morning, Horner said he had a sex scene with Jenna Haze, who plays the lead role of Samantha.

“She’s beautiful and fun to be with,” he said. “Sometimes things just don’t work out on a set in sex scenes, but today was a very happy day for me.”

Teagan, who plays daughter Tabitha, explained that she doesn’t perform any girl/girl in the movie — the implication of incest prevents her from being with most of her hot female co-stars.

“I can’t do it with Jenna Haze because she’s my mom,” Teagan said. “Eva Angelina is my aunt. Nina Hartley is my grandma. All the cute girls are family members.”

So, why is Tabitha a hot 18-year-old instead of a pouty toddler, like in the TV show? And who does she finally get to do it with?

“I get changed by magic, from a one-year-old to an 18-year-old,” Teagan explained. “I have all the knowledge of an 18-year-old and the whole movie is me getting a crash course in sex.

“I’m doing a scene with James Deen,’ Teagan added. “He plays a Ken doll. I do magic and I bring my Ken doll to life, and say, ‘Hey, I’m horny. Wanna fuck?’”

Teagan also is excited about wearing lots of cute outfits; she has a little girl sailor dress. For her birthday scene, which is what they’re shooting today, she’s dressed like Strawberry Shortcake and wearing a goofy party hat. The whole cast is wearing goofy party hats.

When Ryder calls everyone onto the set, to shoot the birthday party dialogue, the ensemble is incredible: Teagan and Haze stand in the background and Hartley, Horner and Angelina are on the couch. Bartholet, who is playing Darren’s boss Larry Tate, is practicing being changed into a Chihuahua. Meanwhile, the Chihuahua is held off-camera by its handler.

Ron Jeremy is running around off-camera, dressed in his swami get-up to play Dr. Bombay, with Snow and starlet Sunny Lane as his belly-dancing escorts. Nathan Threat and Dane Cross are doing what male talent do; just hanging out in the background, waiting for their turn to perform.

Ryder calls for quiet, and it’s quickly obvious that shooting nine people doing dialogue is a lot harder than shooting two people having sex. But in the end, about 12 hours later, when the homeowner is kicking the crew out of the house after a long, last day, the director knows it will be all worth it.

He’s already making plans for his next movie.

“We’re making ‘Not the Bradys XXX 2,’ but we’re in no hurry to put it out because the first one is still selling like hotcakes,” Ryder said. “But it will be out sometime in the fall. We’re doing a ‘Beverly Hillbillies’ remake with Adam & Eve. We’re doing the ‘Partridge Family.’

“These are fun movies to shoot,” he added. “Whenever you have an 18-year old hottie on the set, life is good.”

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