LOS ANGELES — The American Scientific Measurement Corporation (ASMC) has announced the release of its Original Dick Ruler, a novelty item that encourages men to exaggerate the size of their penises.
“Just in time for the holidays, the Original Dick Ruler is a nine-inch wood ruler printed to 12-inch specifications, allowing men to awesomely exaggerate their genital stature to potential conquests,” a spokesperson for ASMC said.
According to ASMC, the Original Dick Ruler “makes six inches look like eight” and “makes you look 30 percent bigger.”
“The Original Dick Ruler is the perfect conversation starter about dick size, and initial customer reviews are both promising and hilarious,” ASMC said.
One reviewer wrote, “We know that sometimes, you want a ruler you can hold next to something six inches long — and make that thing look like it is eight inches long." And another reviewer wrote, “Definitely a quality product, but my dick still looks small."