opinion

Consumers demand more Drink Booze Parties

Gram Ponante
Now more than ever, America's porn consumer is craving more drink booze parties in his adult entertainment.

Finger pressed firmly to the pulse of an insatiable public (yes, I used that word twice today), Flashpoint Productions has released Spring Break River Rats, a collection of pornographic images relating to rivers.

This is an assumption; the pictures are kind of small.

What's important here is that the video promises more drink booze parties as well as more hot sex.

You might say:

"Grams, it's just a spelling error. They meant drunk booze parties."

And I would say:

"So the booze party itself is drunk?"

Then:

"Who says 'booze party' anymore? The 90-year-old janitor at Gram Ponante Towers, Autoclave, Helipad, and Sub-zero freezerium?"

Then:

"It's not like it would be a drunk milk party."

It frightens me that alcohol is being used to sell pornography. It really should be enough that they're in a river.

BONUS: The cover model seems to be some kind of gladiator. This movie is all over the place.

Previously: But is it good for the Jews?

See also: Sandy Bunz

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