I think almost every woman between the ages 25 and 45 has seen “Sex and the City” and every man must have heard how his woman is either a Carrie, in a Samantha phase, is busy building a career like Miranda or a hopeless romantic like Charlotte.
What I got from that movie is a book Charlotte purchased after her divorce, “Starting Over Yet Again.”
This job gives you great confidence. I’ve been with Studio 20 for less than a year. I never thought I could change my ways. Never saw myself as a sexy kitten. Now, I’m happy, I make money, I found love. I started over yet again and had fallen in love with the greatest person alive: Me! -Aria Hayes, Cam Model
Allow me to explain.
My name is Aria Hayes and I am a cam model. Proud #girlsfromstudio20 cam girl. Yes, we are a thing. I worked for an international company for six years as a brand manager. Corporate white-collar stuff. Before that, I worked for another international company as chief marketing. My life was made out for me. I had the job everyone wanted. I dated a guy that worked in the same field as I was in. We went on vacation twice a year (seaside in the summertime and maybe mountainside for New Year’s Eve). We had a group of friends that we met on Fridays. It was all the same boring thing, every day.
That is, until I found out he was seeing another girl. When I asked him why, he told me that I am not a woman, I am not sexy and I don’t know how to tease him. Then, I looked at myself in the mirror and for the first time in years I actually saw myself: plain, pale, unhappy. I was mad at him but I was more mad at myself for allowing myself to get to that state. So, I cleaned up my house, the closets, I donated all his clothes to charity and never saw him again. I found myself at 29 all alone, no boyfriend, no friends and my family was so upset I left him, that they wouldn’t speak to me. I went to work like I did every day but I was not happy. Sure, I was making lots of money, sure I was seen as a big thing in my company ... but I was not happy.
I quit my job after I saw an ad from Studio 20. In Romania, cam studios and cam models are seen as something bad, as a taboo. But I did it anyways. I did some research and then I called them. The day of the interview I was so nervous, I felt like I was pitching for my biggest client. And come to think about it, I was. But this client was me. I had to sell myself to me.
I got in the studio, a nice girl invited me into the meeting room and we started talking. It wasn’t your normal interview — it’s not like I had any resume that I could’ve brought and I highly doubt that they would have been impressed with my marketing skills, haha.
She asked me how my English was, what’s my personal and professional background and a lot of stuff about what I want to get from this job and why do I want to do it. She didn’t seem convinced. So I looked her in the eyes and told her, with tears in my eyes and trembling: “I need to feel like a woman again, I need to see myself as a sexy human being, I want to feel wanted, I want to have people that care about me, I want to make money. Can you help me do this?”
I was scheduled for a photoshoot the next day and they let me in on my training schedule. When I look at my first photoshoot I cringe. You could see how nervous I was even though the photographer was amazing and tried his hardest to make me feel comfortable.
The next days were like a storm. I didn’t realize what I got myself into, I had to be sexy, I had to play, I had to make them want me when I didn’t even want myself. Studio 20 offered me free make-up courses, a therapist with whom I could speak with and a great family of trainers that were there for me.
It’s strange to be on cam for the first time. Everyone thinks it’s funny, but it’s scary as hell. You are by yourself in a room with some people you have no idea how they look or what they want, just looking at you and analyzing you. I called them “wankers” because I had no desire to want to talk to them. I thought they only saw me as a piece of meat, I think that I wanted them to see me like that ... just to feel wanted.
Then, I started talking to them. And I found so many great people, I started having fun, I felt sexy and wanted. This job gives you great confidence. I’ve been with Studio 20 for less than a year. I never thought I could change my ways. Never saw myself as a sexy kitten.
Now, I’m happy, I make money, I found love.
I started over yet again and had fallen in love with the greatest person alive: Me!
Aria Hayes transformed her life from an unsatisfying white-collar existence into that of a gorgeous, confident and happily independent cam model. She now thrives at Studio 20 and this is her first-ever column for XBIZ Cam World.