Believe it or not, that last one may not be a crime under current Wisconsin law, even though having sex with a live animal clearly is against state law.

According to a recent opinion issued by the Wisconsin Court of Appeals, Wisconsin’s law prohibiting “committing an act of sexual gratification with an animal” apparently does not cover having sex with animal carcasses.

From the court’s discussion:
“Hathaway first argues his conviction should be reversed because the term ‘animal’ in WIS. STAT. § 944.17(2)(c) does not include an animal carcass. He rather convincingly contends that ‘animal’ means a living creature.”

Fortunately for Wisconsin’s authorities, residents and yet-to-be-violated deer carcasses, Mr. Hathaway pleaded ‘no contest’ to the charge when it was first entered, and as the court observed, a “plea of guilty or no contest waives all nonjurisdictional defects and defenses.”

Rest in Peace, Bambi’s mom — you’re safe, for now.